munnin | Fic: Camelot here we come. Fangirls of Speed

Title: Camelot here we come

Series: The Fangirls Pretty Boy Orgy. Ezzy's Part one here

Author: Munnin
Warning: Crack silliness

Author’s notes: 100% organic. May contain minor flaws and imperfections that beta-treated fics wouldn’t.

Characters: Team Fangirl
Rating: PG for silliness only

Disclaimer: All fun, no cash

Summery: This is all Ezzy’s idea. I’m just lending some costume and braincells.

As the meeting slowly dispersed, Munnin sat down next to Ezzy. “So? Camelot?”

“Yup. That’s the plan.” The young girl’s feet swung freely, wicked half smile playing on her lips.

“Well you’re going to need period clothing. You’ll stick out like a sore thumb looking like that.” She nodded at Ezzy’s candy striped tights and lace-layered skirt. “I’m sure I can find something that’ll fit. For you and Alichay both.”

“Thanks. That would be nice. I haven’t dressed up in a while.”

Munnin watched the younger Fangirl out of the corner of her eye. “So do you want an extra set of hands for this run? I know the territory well enough. And although I know you can handle yourself...” She cocked her eyebrow at Ezzy, not at all taken in by the younger girl’s innocent smile. “It might help to have a sword to back you. Two if Bittenfeld’s up for it. I can outfit us all and another competent sword is always welcome.”

Ezzy’s eye gleamed with evil delight. “Let’s do it!”

***

Munnin flicked the length of red silk over her shoulder and tied it in a knot, drawing the ends back to form a caplet over her shoulders.

“How do you do that?” Bittenfeld muttered, fighting with the ends of her white veil.

Munnin smiled and helped her to straighten her veil. “Years of practice. Mostly of which was standing in car parks learning to tie it without a mirror.” She retied Bitt’s headwear, tucking the beaded ends over her shoulders.

Ezzy swept into the room, the long skirt and dipped sleeves for her regal red dress swishing around her. “Don’t I look glorious!”

“Oh yes.” Bitt grinned, “A perfect princess.”

“Except for the hat. I’m missing the pointy hat with the floaty scarf on it.” Ezzy smiled as Munnin groaned, keeping her mouth shut and refusing to get drawn into that argument. Again. Munnin was happy to provide them with medieval costumes as disguises but her inner re-enactor rebelled at the thought of Disney clichés. Not that historical accuracy mattered a lot in Camelot but she did have some pride.

“How are we going with the portal Alichay?” Bitt called, adjusting the straps on her back scabbard so her sword sat hidden under the folds of her cloak.

Alichay yelled something in returned but it was muffled by the machinery she was laying under. “Almost there.” Munnin could help but smile; dressed as she was in a dark blue wool Viking apron dress, Alichay still had her lab coat on over the top. “All right. Ready to go.”

“Everyone clear on the plan?” Ezzy asked.

“Ride till we find them. Kill them all.” Munnin muttered.

Bitt cuffed her teasingly. “Wrong film.”

“Yeah but...Antonio Banderas?”

“Good point. We could always stop past on the way back.”

Alichay cleared her throat meaningfully, shooting them a look that stopped the sidetracking instantly. “You each have a set of slap-patches. Get close enough and stick one to their skin and they’ll be out like a light in seconds but make sure you get it right. You need to place them close to the pulse points to have maximum effect so neck, inner wrist or inner thigh.”

Munnin stifled a giggle as Bitt glanced at her with a suggestive smile but a warning flash of Alichay’s glasses pulled them back to attention. “We’ll need to move fast with Merlin – his magic may have unexpected reaction to the sedative. So get him as close to the portal as possible before you dope him.”

“So lure them to the portal, dope them both and drag them through?” Bitt verified.

Munnin shrugged. “We could always do Arthur first, use him as bait to get Merlin close?”

“Sounds like fun. How are you going to get to his royal inner thigh?” Ezzy grinned.

“I’ve been watching him and he’s a stickler for etiquette.” Munnin leant forward. “If one of us challenges him to a duel, just a play fight, nothing to the death; he’s honour bound to take off his gauntlets and shake hands when it’s over. Thus – inner wrist.”

“Now remember what I told you: the pendants will open the portal automatically when you get close enough. You each have a spare if you need them to bring Arthur and Merlin through. Don’t lose them, whatever you do. ” Alichay warned gravely.

They all nodded and double checked their gear, Bittenfeld tugged restlessly on the straps of her scabbard. “Ready to do this thing?”

Munnin hefted the bundle that contained her sword, bow and armour, sliding her small knife to beneath her right hand. “Let’s bag us some pretty boys.”

(Ok so I blame my housemate for the costume fussing but in all fairness Bitt is wearing one of her outfits.)

The quote is from 13^th Warrior –

Ahmed: "Do we have anything resembling a plan?"

Herger: "Ride until we find them. Kill them all."