Fic: Warning to all WRL drivers.

[munnin]

Title: Warning to all WRL drivers.

Author: Munnin
Warning: Crack silliness. I’m sorry! It’s out of control now.

Author’s notes: 100% organic. May contain minor flaws and imperfections that beta-treated fics wouldn’t.

Characters: Team Fangirls and half the cast of the Speed_fic community. Please forgive me if I’ve left you out or portrayed you wrongly, drop me a comment and I’ll fix it.
Rating: PG for silliness only

Disclaimer: All fun, no cash

Summery: Briefing given to all WRL drivers as a warning of the current situation.

Warning to all WRL drivers.

We have unconfirmed reports that the notorious Team Fangirl Racers have been sighted at WRL sponsored training sessions.

For those not familiar with the accounts – the Team Fangirl Racers are said to be an all female racing pack infamous for both their on and off track antics.

Reputed to be merciless drivers, the Fangirls are dangerously coordinated as head hunters. Reports coming out of the European League include some barely legal and truly frightening car mounted equipment and racing techniques.

More worrying are the reports of their off track behaviour. The Fangirls are alleged to have a voracious appetite when it comes to men. Hunting in packs not unlike their racing style, the Fangirls have been known to use coercion, bribery, blackmail and even physical violence in order to get what they want.

The most dangerous fact about the Fangirls is that no-one knows their true numbers. We have photos and bios for only a handful of them. Most of the information at hand is patched together from eyewitness reports from both race encounters and these of a more physical and personal nature.

Any WRL driver encountering any of the below individuals are to contact the CIB immediately and avoid contact at all costs.

Bittenfeld– also known by the name Bara no Kish, Bittenfeld is believed to be one of the ring leaders of the group. Her charisma and support is known to have recruiting others to the cause, shaping the current group.

Bittenfeld’s weapon of choice is the Shin gunto. Although her connection to military Japan is unknown, Bittenfeld’s interest in Japanese culture is clearly evident in her appearance.

The Honourable Death - Bittenfeld’s car is easily recognisable by its red lacquered exterior emblazoned with kanji of the vehicle’s name.

Lali Lemons – it would be unwise to be fooled by this racer’s sweet and seemingly innocent demeanour – Lali is among the dangerous of the Team Fangirl Racers. A constant source of ideas and inspiration, Lali Lemons is often responsible for egging on other racers and encouraging them to act on their most rash and debased instincts.

The Midnight Rainbow – a black T180 with rainbow stripes is far easier to recognise on the track that her driver is off it. Although famous for wearing a blazingly bright race suit, eyewitness accounts include references to male racers being approached by a woman in nondescript black, realising too late that it was Lemons. Racers are advised to be on their guard at all times.

Princess Ezzy – seemingly a newcomer to the group, Essy has already firmly entrenched herself as a member of Team Fangirls with some truly evil acts of crack and angst. Believed to be inspired by the fictional racer Penelope Pitstop, Princess Ezzy is most readily identified by her pink race suit and flowing scarf.

Merlin’s Bane – the dark green car flecked with metallic gold is believed to be one of the powerhouses of the team. Reports vary as to what additions the Bane is equipped with but all are succinct on one detail – the Bane and its fearsome driver are to be avoided at all costs.

Joe Darko – also seemingly new to the team Joe has made a name for herself as an expert image manipulator. Producer of complex flash icons, Joe’s skills are highly prized by the Fangirls. Difficult to identify by her clothing, Joe appears to have a predilection for elaborate costumes and is rarely seen in the same outfit twice. The only truly identifying trait is her constant companion – the feline Zig Racer who is reported to be as dangerous as his owner.

Little is known about Joe Darko’s car - the Auror’s Wand. It is possible she changes it along with her outfit.

Brazilian by birth, Joe is described as being careful about her English although her image manipulation skill speak for themselves – be cautious if you see this woman with a camera as any image she has access to may be distorted and used as blackmail later.

Munnin – also known as Odanin or Odin’s Child, this Australian racer is reported to have left the TAT Racer Team under mysterious circumstances over twelve months ago. Believe to have left the racing; she was recently sighted in the company of the Fangirls. Although more timid in her style since her re-emergence, Munnin’s reputation for a ‘take no prisoners’ approach proceeds her as her racing becomes more aggressive.

The Odin’s Eye – though in appearance Munnin’s vehicle has not changed – a black T180 marked with a metallic blue raven, reports indicate that certain modifications may have been made to both the car’s offensive and defensive capabilities.

Other individuals know to associate with Team Fangirl:

Nautilusl – once believed to be a member of Team Disney, Nautilusl’s art if often seen emblazed down the side of the Fangirl’s cars.

Alichay – rarely seen in public, Alichay is reported to be a casual racer and member of the Fangirl’s technical team, often referred to as being closely aligned with Princess Ezzy.

0oraeraeo0 – this celebrated artist is believed to be a racer in training. One to watch out for.

Rekindle – reported to work with the Fangirls in a supportive role, Rekindle is a figure of much speculation.

Purple Weasle – of uncertain affiliation and casually believed to be entirely mad, Purple Weasle has however, on several occasions, struck terrible blows for the Fangirl cause. Dangerous, presumed armed.

Doily_fic & Creativestrata – little is known about these two other than they have been know to practice a rather nasty for of head-hunting known as Ninja Smut.

Notorious Pirate – another individual about whom we know very little beyond possessing a fast and dangerous wit.

If approached by any of the above individuals; WRL drivers are advised to act with extreme caution and contact the CIB for immediate assistance or rescue.